Monty Woodall Cox

Monty Woodall Cox was born in Durham, NC, on September 26th, 1945. He was born on his father, Alfred LeRoy Cox's, birthday. His mother was Eva Avery Woodall Cox. He was an only child. He was very close to his cousins, Wilbur, Ann, and Susan Woodall, who lived an hour east of Durham. 

He attended grade school and high school in Durham and graduated in 1963. He was in high school when the first African American student, Jocelyn McKissick, integrated the school. He remembered the crowd watching and the police cars and news reporters who drove up as the new student began her classes. This was a transformative experience for Monty, influencing him to support the civil rights movement, and towards a career in service to others.

He attended Duke University where he majored in history and graduated with honors in 1967. 

During his college years Monty became involved in the Methodist Student Center at Duke and decided to go on Project Nicaragua - a summer of construction and teaching in a rural village in an English-speaking area of Nicaragua. He said that he felt he had to go. It ended up being a rite of passage for him as felt more freedom and independence from the attitudes of many of those in North Carolina at that time. The next two summers he spent in another program of the Methodist Student Center: he was a camp counselor with inner city youth in Albany, New York.

As a result of such experiences he felt a call to ordained ministry and decided to attend Union Theological Seminary in New York City. He responded to an invitation to spend an Intern Year in New York City in Metropolitan Urban Service Training (MUST). He worked in a bookstore and lived in East Harlem and attended church at the East Harlem Protestant Parish.

It was during that year, 1968, that he met Carol Ruth Matteson who was also in the MUST program but in the group in the East Village of Manhattan. He and Carol met, became engaged and got married in the Union Seminary Chapel in 1968. 

Monty received his Master of Divinity Degree from Union Seminary in 1971. He was told he was a good listener and decided to go into chaplaincy work rather than a parish. He worked with the East Midtown Protestant Chaplaincy which included Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Hospital, New York Hospital, Lenox Hill Hospital and The Hospital for Special Surgery. He was ordained as a deacon in 1971 and an elder in 1975 in the New York Annual Conference of the United Methodist Church. 

Monty and Carol took a very memorable trip to Africa in 1973, visiting Zaire, Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe), Kenya and Ethiopia. People they had worked with put them in touch with people in each place they visited. They concluded that trip by visiting Carol's brother, David, and his family who were in Denmark on a Sabbatical that year.

The following year in June of 1974, Christopher Matteson Cox was born in White Plains Hospital, north of New York City. Monty and Carol each worked 3 days a week and equally shared caring for Chris. In January of 1977 Kevin Cox Matteson was born at Roosevelt Hospital in Manhattan, delivered by midwife. Their two sons and their families gave them great joy and, now that they're adults, much support and love.

Carol graduated from Union Seminary and became a parish minister. She was appointed part-time to the Church of All Nations in lower Manhattan and they moved there in June 1977. Monty went back to school at the Blanton-Peale Graduate Institute in Manhattan to study to become a pastoral psychotherapist. 

Carol was appointed to Fordham United Methodist Church in the Bronx in 1981. That church had people from all over the world and their family enjoyed living and attending worship there. Monty was very supportive of Carol's ministry in each church she served. They adopted a dog whom Monty named "Cuddles" during that time. They became good friends with other couples: Rev. George McClain and Rev. Tilda Norberg; Rev. Judy and Barry Thomas, and Rev. Jane and Jack Middleton. George and Tilda and Judy and Barry had children of close enough ages that they would play with Chris and Kevin.

Monty was asked to join the staff of the Riverside Church Pastoral Counseling Center in upper Manhattan, near Columbia University, and worked there until 1992. During that time we moved to New Rochelle, NY, where Carol became the pastor of Christ UMC. Again the church had a very diverse congregation with many people from other countries.

In December of 1984 Monty became ill with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. He was able to continue to work part-time until 1992 when the specialist he had worked with told him that he should stop working. He did and this was a major adjustment in his life. He coped with it amazingly well. He continued to support Carol in her work and did more of the childcare and prepared meals. Carol then worked full-time. 

Chris and Kevin went off to college and Monty and Carol moved to Scarsdale and then Katonah, NY, for Carol's work. Carol retired and they moved to Tucson, AZ, for two years to help care for Carol's mother.

Eventually Chris and his family moved to Hamburg, Germany. Kevin and his family moved to Yellow Springs, OH. Carol and Monty moved to Yellow Springs to be near Kevin and his family.

In 2023 Monty was diagnosed with dementia and he and Carol moved to Friends Care Community. In Yellow Springs they attended the Yellow Spring Friends Meeting at Rockford Chapel.

Friends and family have said that Monty was kind, thoughtful and humble. He was always ready to lend an ear to another. He will be remembered for his gentle spirit and devotion to family.

He is survived by his wife, Carol, his son, Christopher, daughter-in-law, Allison Carrington Young, and granddaughter, Emilia, and his son, Kevin Cox Matteson, daughter-in-law, Eden Robertson Matteson, and grandson, Eli, and granddaughter, Violet.

A private memorial service was held for the immediate family before Chris, Allison and Emilia returned to Hamburg. There will be a public memorial service at the Friends Meeting House at a future date to be announced.

Donations may be made to a charity of your choice; to the General Board of Global Ministries of the United Methodist Church (you may select a project to donate to); or to The Yellow Springs Friends Meeting.

"May the road rise up to meet you,

 May the wind be always at your back,

 May the sun shine warm upon your face,

 And the rain fall soft upon your field;

 And until we meet again,

 May God hold you in the palm of God's hand.

 Amen."