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In Memory Of
Barbara Calarese Dirr
1942 2026

Barbara Calarese Dirr

Sep 6, 1942 — Aug 4, 2026

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It is with profound sadness, that we announce the passing of Barbara Calarese Dirr. Her soul was liberated, on August 4, 2026, after many months of struggling with Alzheimer’s. Barbara was born, Barbara Catherine Mastriani, on September 6, 1942, in Schenectady, New York, to Patrick (Pasquale) and Sarah (formerly Button) Mastriani. She was their much beloved only child. Barbara showed an incredible gift for reading and writing at a very early age, and as a high school student preparing for college, decided to pursue English studies. She was awarded a full-ride scholarship to New York University, and graduated with honors with a Master’s degree in English. It was at NYU where she would meet the world renowned Italian Olympic medalist (4 x) and World Champion fencer, Wladimiro Calarese, who she would later go on to marry and have two children with, Gino and Mia.

After Wladimiro earned his PhD in aeronautical engineering, they moved to Kettering, Ohio, where Wladimiro accepted a research scientist position at Wright Patt Air Force Base. It was at that time that Barbara started teaching first at Centerville and then Oakwood high school. She would spend a decade at Oakwood teaching sophomore English and Drama. Barbara was known for her moving theatrical teachings of Shakespeare. Many students have commented throughout the years that she was their favorite teacher, and that she had a major impact on their lives. She was encouraging to those who were not having an easy time in school and their social lives. Her compassionate nature resonated with her students, as she genuinely cared about what was going on in their inner worlds. She always celebrated the wins in other people’s lives, and she would be the first to commiserate and console anyone who was suffering. By the time she retired, Barbara had taught at Centerville, Oakwood, Bellbrook, Sinclair and was an adjunct at the University of Dayton.

Though Barbara truly enjoyed teaching, her real passion was acting and singing. Upon moving to the Dayton area, she sang with the Dayton Opera in multiple productions, such as Madame Butterfly, La Traviata, and Turandot. She acted locally with multiple theater companies in productions at the Dayton Playhouse, The Human Race Theatre company, the Theatre Guild, and the Indianapolis Shakespeare festival. Some of her most notable roles were Kate in Kiss Me Kate, Virginia in Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf, Eleanor in The Lion in Winter, Maggie in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, and M’Lynn in Steel Magnolias (the latter at the Victoria Theater). For countless years, she would wake up, get the kids ready for school, start teaching at 8 AM, go home, grade papers for hours, make dinner (always from scratch as she was an AMAZING cook), then go straight to a theatrical rehearsal, get home at 10 PM and do the whole thing over again. She was devoted to her family, her students, and the theater, as they all fed her soul. Her life was truly filled with purpose.

Her passion for acting was never about getting accolades or attention, or feeding her ego (which was non-existent). She did it because she wanted to express all the facets of the human condition. She wanted to learn and to connect with like-minds and deep-thinkers. She was active in a very long-standing book club, and was a voracious reader, as well as a shockingly fast one at that. It seemed as soon as she started a novel, she was finished and already starting another. She also loved movies and would immerse herself in period dramas and series, especially feeling a deep connection to anything set in the British Isles. She considered herself a true Anglophile, especially since her mother’s side of the family went all the way back to 16th century England.

Barbara also had a real penchant for fashion, and always loved going shopping with her kids. She had an elegant yet bold sense of style, and turned heads wherever she went. When it came to jewelry, she liked to say (tongue firmly in cheek) “if you can lift it, you can wear it”! And when it came to interior design, she made a stunning home, filled with art and antiques. Her love of aesthetic beauty was a major influence on her children, as both Gino and Mia earned their Bachelor’s degrees in Art History.

In 1990, she, her daughter Mia, and her husband Wladimiro, moved to London, England for a new consulting contract Wladimiro acquired through the Air Force. As Barbara joined Wladimiro on his work trips, she was able to travel extensively throughout Europe, as well as Egypt and Israel. A life-affirming event for her was when she visited the site where Jesus gave his ‘Sermon on the Mount’. Though she reveled in her time living in England, during their 3 years there, they would tragically lose their son (& brother) Gino. Gino passed away while visiting the family in London. He was surrounded in the hospital by Barbara, Wladimiro, Mia and his loving and long-time partner, James. After Gino’s passing, Barbara and Wladimiro moved back to Ohio, where, after 33 years, they sadly ended their marriage.

Years later, Barbara met, fell in love with and married Bob Dirr, of Cincinnati. They shared a love for creative writing, poetry, literature, rock ‘n’ roll, and the New York Times crossword puzzles, over coffee on lazy mornings, cuddled up in their bath robes. They shared 10 happy years together and eventually moved to Nashville, Tennessee, to have a fresh start and do something new and exciting. They enjoyed themselves immensely in their new community, and made the most of their time by enjoying live music in the city. It was in Nashville, after a hard-fought battle, that Bob passed of cancer in 2012. No longer wanting to live so far apart, after 20 years in Seattle, Mia decided to move to Nashville to join her mother in 2013, and in 2015 gave birth to her daughter Olivia. Barbara was over the moon to become, at long last, a GRANDMOTHER!!

Being Olivia‘s Nana gave Barbara so much joy as she and Mia relished Olivia’s baby and toddler years. In 2016 Mia decided to take on motherhood solo, parting ways with Olivia’s father. At that point Barbara and Mia decided they both wanted to move back to Ohio, and would raise Olivia in Dayton. They all lived together happily in Oakwood. But not even two years later, it would be discovered that Barbara had colon cancer. After surgery and chemo, she successfully beat cancer. But the chemotherapy that helped save her life, also created new problems.

After she was in remission, about a year later, she had a stroke. And eventually another mild stroke would follow. Though it greatly weakened her physically, she was blessed to not have her speech affected and did not suffer from any paralysis. After recovering and getting back to normal life, shortly before the pandemic in 2020, Barbara decided that she wanted a change of pace and moved to 10 Wilmington Place. She enjoyed an active social life, made many new friends, and loved going down to the formal dining room. She especially enjoyed going to Happy Hour to have a tipple of scotch, and sing songs around the piano with her friends.

After about four years of living at 10 Wilmington, Barbara started taking regular falls. At that point, it made the most sense to move to a retirement home where there were caregivers on hand 24 hours a day, and a move was made to the Wellington of Dayton in March of 2024. Over the next two years, her decline became pronounced, but even with Alzheimer’s, she never lost her dignity, her charm, or her big, beautiful smile. Her caregivers always remarked how much they loved her, and that she was “one of the good ones”. She embraced everyone, everywhere she went and appreciated the people around her, ‘out-loud’.

In the spring of 2026 it became evident that Hospice at-home services were needed. Their support became invaluable, especially in her final days. She passed at Hospice of Dayton less than 24 hours after she was admitted to their in-patient facility. Physically and mentally she had been dealt so much, but her spirit never waned. A spirit that burned so brightly, a presence that lit up every room that she entered. She was a beacon of all that is good in the world. She had a huge heart, a brilliant mind, an amazing sense of humor, was a hard worker, undeniably talented and was a fierce ally to her family, her students, and all who she considered a friend. She always rooted for the underdog in life, and didn’t have a mean bone in her entire physical being. There is no doubt that when she was relieved of her broken body, she had the most glorious homecoming with her cherished son Gino, who she waited 35 years to join.

She is survived by her daughter and granddaughter Mia and Olivia Calarese of Kettering OH , her son-in-law James Frederick of Provincetown MA, her sister and brother-in-laws Venny & Glen Cole of West Chester OH, and her long-time friends Catherine Crowley of Oakwood OH and Maria Thornton of Yellow Springs OH. A celebration of life service will be held in the auditorium of the Dayton Art Institute, followed by a reception in their Rotunda, on September 9, 2026 at 4 PM.

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Celebration of Life

Wednesday, September 9, 2026

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